Jermaine Cole has a background that I've already gone over several times but here it is again: young rapper that rises to "Hip Hop Savior" status after releasing a good series of mixtapes, gets signed by Jay-Z, ultimately disappoints with his debut album (apparently, I'm a lot harsher on Cole World than most, but whatever; fuck that album and it's bitch mother), and has been trying to recapture his former glory ever since. I'm sure that if I was feeling extra lazy I could have simply copy and pasted my introductory paragraphs I wrote for Born Sinner last year, because Jermaine is in the exact same predicament. Regardless of its impressive sales numbers, J Cole plateaued on his 2013 release and its existence has almost completely been forgotten a year later. What a pointless fucking album.
But Cole's back at it again, this time without any help or promotion. That's right, as an artist that has thrived off of singles and collaborations, J Cold chose to release an album with no singles or collaborations. How could that possibly be a good decision? I mean, his confidence is admirable, and I personally could give less of a fuck, but I have a hard time imagining Roc Nation being completely alright with this lack of promotion. But desperate times call for desperate measures, I suppose, and the old thing sure as hell wasn't working, so this might be a step in the right direction after all. For my own sake, let's hope so. I can't sit through another "Crooked Smile".
2014 Forest Hills Drive continues J Cole's quest to be known for both a rapper and his work behind the boards. As previously stated, there's no features, which alone makes it the most J Cole-y album ever made, but he also takes care of the majority of the album's production. The few friends he invited to the production party all stand as some of today's most popular producers, which I guess serves as Cole's way of claiming he's aware of current hip hop trends and wishes to capitalize on them just like any other sane rapper today.
2014 Forest Hills Drive exists.
1. Intro
Well, there's not much going on here, but this was actually a pretty good way to introduce the album. Jermaine will never be known for his singing, but when used in short spurts, it can be mildly effective. The understated instrumental works as a nice counterpart to the insanely bombastic material featured on Born Sinner's intro, where he unloaded a series of gay slurs and accused us of being homophobic. Still don't know where he was going with all that.
2. January 28th
Could it be? Why, yes it is: this is actually a really good track. Jermaine's instrumental mines from both old-school playfulness (the drums, for the most part) and from the sinister place that the J Cole that is actually good at what he does has been hiding, as "December 28th" (that's Cole's birthday, for those of you that don't want to open another tab) contains the finest Cole performance I've heard in quite a while. This one is up there with his best mixtape material as a perfect marriage of instrumental and shit-talking. I'd didn't really care for him claiming to be better than Slick Rick, Big Daddy Kane, Rakim, and LL Cool J (Rakim and Kane had tighter flows, Slick Rick's storytelling is still untouched, and as LL's stage presence is that of legend), but it'd be hypocritical for be to get too aggravated by what I assume is a little bit of hyperbole. Let's hope.
3. Wet Dreamz
Jermaine's instrumental wasn't bad, but "Wet Dreamz" is ultimately just as bad as you'd expect. Cole recounts the first time he had sex with lurid detail, even describing himself watching porn for pointers, and practicing putting on a condom. He shows humility, sure, and even though this was kind of interesting upon first listen, there is literally no reason anyone would ever need to hear this again. Also, what the fuck kind of hook is this? It feels halfhearted at best, and I can honestly barely remember it as I write these words down. Moving on...
4. 03' Adolescence
J Cole really likes to hammer this "everyday rapper" image into your head, which I can only assume was the motivation for the last song, and even though the whole schtick gets old after a while, there's still examples of how well the formula can work: this is one of them. Cole takes the age old approach of talking about how hard he had it growing up, but the mood suddenly changes when he gets a reality check from a friend who's future isn't nearly as bright. Our host spends part of the song talking about how much he envies this particular friend, but it turns out his buddy admired Cole. I have to admit, this is a really impressive and fresh way of presenting the whole different perspective thing. Not bad at all.
5. A Tale of 2 Citiez
This Vinylz beat is kind of jarring at first: the two samples pushed in right on top of one another clash awkwardly and violently. A funny thing happens on the way to the forum, however: as “A Tale of 2 Citiez” plays on, the instrumental worms its way into your head, and suddenly you can't imagine this track without it. So that weirdly worked out for them. J Cole delivers two verses (and a hook) filled with the threats and boasts of what seems like a full grown man from the streets that doesn't have to prove anything to you, you punk-ass little shit, but actually sounds pretty decent, since the music's sped-up pace allows the intensity to build. This completes a one-two punch that's better than anything on Born Sinner.
6. Fire Squad
I know you wanted to know how I felt about this song where J Cole basically calls out the entire white race, and shits on everything they've done for civilization over the previous thousand years. In reality, he makes a couple bars referencing the gentrification of hip hop, but if you just read the reactions of some people, you'd swear my first sentence was accurate. Anyways, J Cole's instrumental is able to match the relative rise in intensity, and it was nice to see some emotion in his voice, even with the corny punchlines. I'd also like to point out that I've been predicting an Iggy Grammy win for months now, so remember that I also called it when it inevitably happens. Once again, the hook was a bit of a stretch, but that's a minor quibble.
7. St. Tropez
Here's a major quibble, though: "St. Tropez" is fucking boring. Yep.
8. G.O.M.D.
This was also pretty bad, but at least it wasn't dull. "G.O.M.D.” appears to be J Cole's attempt at mimicking what the an ignorant radio song sounds like today, and I have to tell you, it doesn't suit him. He tries to drop some deeper rhymes, but he's undermined by how goddamn gimmicky this shit sounds. Sorry, but you can't complain about how people don't sing about love anymore (which they do, it's probably the single most prominent topic in all of music) over a song call "Get Off My Dick". It just doesn't work that way. I don't even know where this instrumental came from either. It trades the album's already established sound for “yeah, I found this on my hard drive, why don't I use it, eh?”, because in my mind that sentence is funnier if Jermaine were somehow Canadian now.
9. No Role Modelz
Somewhere J Cole made a wrong turn, and 2014 Forest Hills Drive started sucking, bad. “No Role Modelz” is a valiant, if doomed, effort to right the ship, with a catchy beat that is abandoned by some terrible J Cole writing ("I came fast like 911 in white neighborhoods", "Martin Luther King would've been on Dreamville") that explores the exact same territory that every other goddamn song he's ever recorded have already charted. We get it, you don't like that girls weren't paying attention to you when you weren't a B list celebrity, and now you're entitled to being a hypocritical douchebag. The only redeeming quality on here was the fact that it used the single greatest George W. Bush quote ever. The fuck is happening right now?
10. Hello
I didn't get to this because I basically ignored the existence of "St. Tropez", but J Cole isn't a very good singer, and now that he's chosen to rely so heavy on it throughout the album's back half, the project has essentially hit rock bottom. Aside from the piss poor excuse for a hook, where the fuck did he find this instrumental? It's not terrible, but this simply isn't something a rapper should be using, and I say that as a person that almost always loves when artists push their instrumental boundaries. But this is something that would fit better on the Frozen soundtrack. Easily the most God-awful song on this album.
11. Apparently
More of the same: Cole is singing, he's talking about his rapping strategy, his tough childhood, bitches, and how he was out partying in New York while his mother's house was being for-closed. Yada yada. Wait, you're telling me that the last thing was actually really interesting subject matter? Well, Cole didn't get the memo, as he addresses what could be one of the most intriguing moments of the album, and throws it to the side after a couple bars. I'd love to say that I'm disappointed, but I'm not. This whole thing was just meh.
12. Love Yourz
I don't know, guys. Cole's message is corny, but not terrible. The beat, though, is from the same vagina that birthed Macklemore's "Same Love", and our host's tendency to occasionally burst out in vocal notes is uncomfortable to say the least. Believe it or not, it's actually possible to make a song with a good message that doesn't sound like shit, and that's something most of today's artists don't realize. It doesn't have to be one or the other. I seriously can't come up with anything else to say about this track. Have any of you watched that movie Boyhood? It's fucking entertaining as shit. Look it up when you have the time. All that critical acclaim is totally justified. Moving on...
13. Note to Self
Really? This is what J Cole came up with? This is how he thought the album should end? A fourteen-minute outro that doesn't feature any extra songs; Cole just rattles off a list folks who were nice enough to help and/or provide inspiration for 2014 Forest Hills Drive. In the immortal words of Patrick Henry, while alongside Dwight D. Eisenhower battling the Tyrannosaurus Rex invasion in the space wars of 2004, "Fuck that shit!" This is exactly why liner notes were created, motherfucker!
Rating: 3/5
2014 Forest Hills Drive starts off wonderfully. In fact, it's the closest he's come to reaching the levels he was at during his mixtapes. The production throughout the album is solid and cohesive, which ultimately makes this J Cole's best and most well rounded album yet. Here's the thing: after the first six songs, J Cole is anchored down by "St. Tropez", and the album sinks from there. Cole never even attempts to come up for air, as there's not a single song after "Fire Squad" that I would ever willingly listen to again. Cole has completely drowned by "Hello" and by the time "Not to Self" comes around, it's the equivalent of watching his rotting corpse on the ocean floor for fourteen minutes. The main thing I took from this album is that J Cole will likely never become the rapper he was only a few years ago, but he's grown into a phenomenal producer. What Cole really needs to do is gather a bunch of his friends (including Kendrick Lamar, because hey, it doesn't look like their collaborative album will ever happen, so this would make up for it) and release a The Chronic-style compilation project showcasing his beats: at least that would earn the man some good karma. God, do I have to think of everything? Not that that would ever happen, but it would be cool. But yeah, maybe don't buy 2014 Forest Hills Drive.