Now, as you can probably tell, it's not 2011 and this album is not called Before I Self Destruct II. This change probably stemmed from Before I Self Destruct under-performing sales-wise, both because it sucked (I will apparently never get over this) and Interscope running into problems in promoting this guy. 50 has yet to change his subject matter over the last decade and he's always had a suspect hear for beats, so it was growing increasingly difficult to market a rapper in his situation. Actual, unsubstantiated rumors revealed that Curtis was actually considering leaving his major label in favor of becoming independent. The long awaited fifth solo album would be called Street King Immortal and hopefully drop in the near future.
In a move that actually really surprised me, 50 really did take his act to the independent scene to record Animal Ambition, which isn't Street King Immortal. Curtis says that album is still coming later this year and that the album that is currently of topic is merely a warm-up for his full on return to hip hop. Now, just by reading that last sentence alone you know that this album sucks. What we'll be listening to is probably the out-takes from an album that likely won't even be worth waiting for, but that's a story for another day.
Perhaps less restricted than he was by the constraints of a major deal, 50 Cent was able to pick from a myriad of different producers, which will hopefully allow him to create the type of music that he thinks his fans actually want to hear. Moreover, 50 claims that this new approach will give him a stepped-up focus on lyricism, which is not to say that Curtis will suddenly morph into Rakim, but there should be a greater emphasis on introspection, and at this point, anything would be a refreshing break from the normal topics. As if to reinforce this aspect of the project, Animal Ambition features guest turns not just from within the 50 Cent Weed Carriers Family, but from outside acts who are known for the most part as being "good rappers", such as Jadakiss, Prodigy, and Styles P, who counts, don't say that he doesn't, you know I'm in the right.
Sadly, Animal Ambition hasn't exactly set the goddamn world on fire (it currently holds a Metacritic score of 54, which is very, very bad) so I can't say I'm really expecting to be blown away by this project. That may work in the favor of 50 Cent though, because anything remotely impressive would catapult this album into the second spot in ranking the mans discography. Silver lining?
I do like how Curtis made it a point to mention that he's at least trying to create something resembling a good album. The official title of this thing is Animal Ambition: An Untamed Desire To Win. Okay never-mind, that's just ridiculous.
1. Hold On
This had no place kicking off the album, but surprisingly, this song is very good. Frank Dukes' instrumental sounds like nothing you'd hear on a 50 Cent album, but that's gonna turn out to be a good thing here, and although 50 has nothing of substance to say, his voice still sounds pretty damn cool, so it's not a complete loss. I have not one single complaint with this song, which is nice considering it feels like I have a lot of those on the way.
2. Don't Worry 'Bout It (Feat. Yo Gotti)
This song fucking sucks. The beat kicks off with a really weird attempt at incorporating some type of electronic-tinge, but it sounds completely half-assed, and after about a minute in, were back to generic-ness. 50 on the other hand sounds ridiculously concerned about people worrying about where he gets his economic income. I can't say I've ever been all that interested, but if that was something that had been keeping me up at night, I'd be able to rest easy. 50 and Yo Gotti combine to tell us not to worry about it exactly 58 times on this four-minute song, which averages out to them repeating the same phrase once every four-point-one seconds. Needless to say, I was unimpressed with the lyrical expertise displayed on this song.
3. Animal Ambition
This serves as the only song that wasn't released as a single prior to the album's release (which is completely ridiculous), and I highly doubt this is what anyone was looking for. First off, the beat is all over the fucking place, and I don't get the feeling that it was done on purpose. It's not really all that interesting either, but you'll forget all about its mediocrity once the absurd hook enters the equation. For whatever reasons, 50 thought it would be a good idea to develop a weird ass accent for his one single line in the chorus. It honestly offends me that someone told him this would be a good idea because I'll guarantee you right now that there's not a single person that wouldn't have rather had our host's actual voice. I'd go on about how cheesy the animal sound effects are, but I'm sure you get the general idea about how I feel on this song.
4. Pilot
I found something oddly entertaining about this one, which is odd considering its fairly similar to the previous two songs, but the bass-line on here is really getting the job done. That and 50 utilizes the one area in rap where he excels: writing a hook. The lyrics aren't all that special, matter of fact they're really bad, but something about his delivery feels so right upon this beat. Just don't come into this with all that high of expectations, and avoid the video at all cost, but if you do all that, you might find a late career gem for our hosts. Huh.
5. Smoke (Feat. Trey Songz)
As this track features the only production credits from Dr. Dre, I naturally looked forward to this most when first seeing the track-list. This sounds like the type of song that would have done alright on the charts in 2009, so of course it sounds like complete shit in 2014. Trey Songz delivers his usual bland hook, but 50 Cent needs to realize that he's never going to be the guy to do a ladies song well. There are artists that do it ten times better than, and the whole reason he blew up in the first place was his grimy approach to music. This will quite simply never be a winning formula.
6. Everytime I Come Around (Feat. Kidd Kidd)
Nobody has ever listened to a 50 Cent project and thought "Man, I wish Kidd Kidd was on this shit!" This is a perfect example of why. On this song, he attempts to rhyme "Doo Doo" with "Blues Clues", which isn't even that damn bad in comparison to some of the other bullshit he tries to pull (on a separate occasion he tries to make "Mickey Mouse" and "Mickey Mantle" rhyme). What I'm trying to say is fuck this guy. 50 Cent has access to nearly every artist he could possibly want, but he opts to force his fans to listen to his new protege who will never amount to shit. The song is pretty bad too. Not because its God awful, but I just listened to it and couldn't tell you a thing about it, which explains why I had to take up half of this paragraph ranting about how useless Kidd Kidd is. But at least that's out of the way.
7. Irregular Heartbeat (Feat. Jadakiss & Kidd Kidd)
Again. 50 put his ass on here again. Two songs in a fucking row. He actually does ruin the track, but before Kidd Kidd starts running his mouth, we're presented with what would have been the best song on the album. G Rocka's use of a heartbeat is pretty clever, and this is probably the best our host has sounded thus far. I've never been all that big of a Jadakiss fan, but he undeniably steals the show here, which isn't too good for 50 Cent, but hey, at least were getting some entertaining material. Still, if you're like me and are only familiar with Jadakiss' work with The LOX (I know, I know), Styles P and Sheek Louch's absence is felt when you're waiting around at the very end, hoping that they didn't forget to pick you up from soccer practice again.
I just, I don't know. It's hard for me to call this terrible, but this has to be one of the least interesting songs I've heard all year. I can't imagine 50 Cent sitting in the studio drunk, high, and feeling the vibe of an R&B hook, but then again, I can't imagine most rappers doing that shit, and yet hip hop tracks with R&B hooks are created at a very rapid pace. For less than ten cents a day, you, too can prevent songs with this mutation from being released into the wild, which will help these artists reach their original goal of entertaining an audience and not selling out.
Curtis invites Mr. Probz, another shitty R&B artist, to help provide a chorus because what the fuck else was he doing, really? Our host continues his refusal to try, which is to say, this collaboration was awful. It all starts with the instrumental, which is annoying, and doesn't sound like something a couple rappers should spit over, and goes south from there, as Curtis fails to recognize how annoying the music is and continues to rhyme over it. Mr. Probz' horribly simplistic hook is nowhere near enough to shift the tides. Oh my fuck this was bad.
I just, I don't know. It's hard for me to call this terrible, but this has to be one of the least interesting songs I've heard all year. I can't imagine 50 Cent sitting in the studio drunk, high, and feeling the vibe of an R&B hook, but then again, I can't imagine most rappers doing that shit, and yet hip hop tracks with R&B hooks are created at a very rapid pace. For less than ten cents a day, you, too can prevent songs with this mutation from being released into the wild, which will help these artists reach their original goal of entertaining an audience and not selling out. Yes, that was literally the exact same thing I wrote for "Hustler". I feel the same way.
Although most albums would have ended with the previous song, Animal Ambition ends with a posse cut featuring Prodigy, the best rapper to appear on this project, Styles P, and yes, Kidd Kidd for the third fucking time. All three of them sound alright, but at this point, I'm having a really hard time giving any type of a fuck. "Chase The Paper" manages to be up-beat and lazy at the same time, but most importantly, it mercifully puts this album to an end.
Animal Ambition is a fucking terrible album. I wouldn't say it's the worst 50 Cent album (which speaks so many volumes about his discography), but its still one of my least favorite albums of the year. It's not even like these songs are offensively bad, they're just boring, lazy, and it sounds as if Curtis couldn't have cared less about the final product. It seems like 50 is completely unaware of how interesting his life actually is. Most rappers would kill to be in his position, but he continuously provides lyrics that would have been supplied by any middle of the road street rapper trying to give you his mixtape at McDonald's. The production is hit or miss, as most of the beats revolve around 50's idea of what a club song should sound like, but on the few times that the album clicks, its because of the darker, grimy instrumentals. "Hold On" and "Irregular Heartbeat", the two best songs, are glimmers of hope, as it shows the potential 50 still has left in the tank, but its hard to imagine him ever sitting down focused on crafting a cohesive album. I wish him the best on Street King Immortal, but this marks the end of me giving a shit about this guy's career.